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Mountain West Media Days: What to expect...

The Mountain West Conference Media Days start tomorrow and run through Wednesday. Here's a schedule of what's going on:

TUESDAY, JULY 24

8 am, Registration (anyone want to go to Vegas on a short notice?)

8 am - 1 pm: NBC Network and CBS Sports Network Interviews with Student Athletes (Different rooms, the athletes themselves will be jumping around from place to place)

8 am - 6 pm: MW Preview Show and TheMWC.com interview the Coaches. Prepare to see an extra booster seat for Chris Ault and lots of Bob Davie saying, "AHHHTEHRYERWHATTHERRSGUNNABEALERTOFFOOTBAWBEINPLAYEDINALBERKERKYBEPREHPERDTOBESERPRISED!"

9 am - 11 am: Student-Athletes interview each other. Only 8 players from 4 schools: Chris Nwoke and Shaq Barrett from CSU, Joe Kellogg and Jamar Taylor from BSU, Jeff Nady and Khalid Wooten from Nevada and B.R. Holbrook and Joseph Harris from New Mexico. This will be set up like The Dating Game except for football.

B.R. Holbrook: "Football player #1, what's your favorite tackling style?"

Jeff Nady: "JEFF SMASH PUNY DL!"

More after the jump:

9 am - Noon: Promo Interview with the coaches. People frantically search for Bobby Hauck as they can't find him. Hey guys, you might want to try the UNLV Athletic Building, he thought all the interviews were on campus...just like the supposed stadium.

10:30 am - 11:30 am: Poinsettia Bowl Q&A (Student-Athletes). PR guy: "So what's your favorite exhibit at Sea World?"

11 am - Noon: Local TV Interview with Coaches and Student-Athletes.

11 am - 12:30 pm: Lunch. Footbaw Bob goes to the 3 dollar buffet in Downtown Vegas because he doesn't like the catering.

Noon - 1 pm: Local TV Interview with Coaches and Student-Athletes.

1 pm - 6 pm: CBS Sports Network Interview with Coaches. This session finishes with Tim DeRuyter boldly saying he'll play anyone, anywhere, like his predecessor, earning the adornment of the Fresno State fans. A surprise win against Colorado at the beginning of the season cements a 10 year contract extension plus the key to the city of Fresno.

1 pm - 6 pm: TheMWC.com Live Chat with Student-Athletes. Click here to join in. Watch as literally dozens of "professional writers" from Bleacher Report get their analysis from this session and later make slideshows about 10 reasons why Colorado State will win the Mountain West.

1 pm - 2 pm: Local TV Interview with Coaches and Student-Athletes.

1 pm - 1:30 pm: Coaches/Student-Athletes Podium Session with Nevada and Air Force...where we still will make "Chris Ault is short" jokes.

1:30 pm - 4 pm: TheMWC.com Interviews with Student-Athletes: where Derek Carr will be asked whether he can beat Boise State or not.

1:30 pm - 2 pm: Print Interview Room - One on one Session.

2 pm - 3 pm: Local TV Interview with Coaches and Student-Athletes.

2 pm - 2:30 pm: Coaches/Student-Athletes Podium Session with Fresno State and Wyoming...once again Derek Carr will be asked if he can beat Boise State.

2:30 pm - 3 pm: Print Interview Room - One on one Session.

3 pm - 4 pm: Local TV Interview with Coaches and Student-Athletes. They finally find Bobby Hauck hiding under Dave Rice's desk. When asked about the upcoming season, he screams, hops in a Ford F-150 drives back to Missoula never to be seen in the Mountain West again.

3:30 - 4 pm: Print Interview Room - One on one Session.

4 pm - 4:30 pm: Local TV Interview with Coaches and Student-Athletes

4:30 pm - 5 pm: Print Interview Room - One on one Session.

5 pm - 5:30 pm: Local TV Interview with Coaches and Student-Athletes

5:30 pm - 6 pm: Print Interview Room - One on one Session. Bob Davie reverts to ESPN analyst mode, criticizing Boise State while Chris Petersen just sits there shaking his head and insisting that they'll just have to work harder.

7 pm - 10 pm: Welcome Reception/Dinner where yours truly may or may not attempt to get himself kicked out of the event by constant trolling.

WEDNESDAY, JULY 25

8:30 am - 9:15 am State of the Conference Address presented by the MW Commissioner Craig Thompson. Way too many jokes to be said here, but I'm willing to bet he's looking at conference expansion, and will include the conference champion of the WAC this year.

8 am - 1 pm: NBC Sports Network Interview with coaches. Rocky Long will point out this year that Colorado State's green uniforms give an unfair advantage on a green field. Dave Rice takes over for Bobby Hauck, where he automatically picks up 3 4-star basketball recruits to play football for him. UNLV has their most successful season at 6-6 when the players realize that "traveling" is allowed in football, and therefore stop committing drops and turnovers.

8 am - 1 pm: CBS Sports Network Talent Session. This will take form of a talent show, where after Derek Carr gets asked a 3rd time whether he can beat Boise State, he gets angry and runs after the media member asking the question. He gets sacked by Jamar Taylor. Mike Edwards' talent is being able to pronounce his teammates name: Paipai Falemalu. Bob Davie shows his talent of being able to take money from big schools like Notre Dame without producing results and Chris Ault will hire Criss Angel to give the illusion of making him seem taller than Cody Farjado.

8 am - 1 pm: MW Preview Show with Student Athletes.

9:15 am - 10 am: Print Interview Room - One on one Session with Craig Thompson, Bowl Partners and TV Partners. This will end with the Hawaii Bowl automatically banning Craig Thompson from attending when he makes a statement that they need to pick up the trash around that area.

9:30 am - Noon: Poinsettia Bowl Q&A. Once again Craig Thompson will get himself banned from attending when he suggests that Colorado Springs has better Fish Tacos than San Diego.

9:30 am - 1 pm: TheMWC.com Interviews Student-Athletes

9:30 am - Noon: Promo Interviews with Coaches. As part of the deal with the Big East, Chris Petersen and Rocky Long will have a green screen behind them showing them both on top of the Empire State Building.

10 am - 11 am: Print Interview Room - One on one Session with Student-Athletes

10 am - 1 pm: Student Athletes interview each other. This includes:

Paipai Falemalu/Mike Edwards, Hawai‘i
Derek Carr/Robbie Rouse, Fresno State
Jordan Eason/Parker Herrington, Air Force
Nick Carlson/Luke Ruff, Wyoming
Doug Zismann/John Lotulelei, UNLV
Gavin Escobar/Leon McFadden, San Diego State

11 am - Noon: Print Interview Room - One on one Session with Student-Athletes

11:30 am - 1:30 pm: Lunch

1 pm: Depart for airport.

If you would like to see the full list of the schedule, click here to see the .pdf. There will be live streams from the media days on the media day central site, so make sure you tune in. If you do go, there are some great weekday rates and the Cosmopolitan (where the media days are held) is easy to get to.