Santa's Mountain West Christmas Gifts

Kirby Lee-USA TODAY Sports

Dear Santa, All I really want for Christmas is peace and good will...and for (insert hated rival here) to never win again.

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

We here at Mountain West Connection bring glad tidings of news. We found Santa Claus' Christmas list to the Mountain West schools left in an abandoned dumpster in Colorado Springs eerily next to the Mountain West HQ. Santa Claus is real. It's not Craig Thompson. He's absolutely, and positively real.

Anyway, here's what Santa's list included:

For the US Air Force Academy: An offensive coordinator who believes in the Air Raid, and names his packages after fighter jets and bombers.

For Boise State: Another team to start a "hated rivalry" with.

For Colorado State: Coverage in a major Colorado newspaper just for them so they won't be overlooked by a worse Colorado team.

For Fresno State: Pat Hill's Mustache: perfectly preserved in glass case for all to see in the athletics complex.

For Hawaii: An Under Armor contract that gives them permanent retro uniforms. Also some form of a Hawaiian king/warrior as an official mascot again.

For Nevada: A replica of the Fremont Cannon. This one you'll never lose. Also "Battle Born" uniforms for all! (note: UNLV will get these too. It's like the Christmas Pajamas of the MWC.)

For New Mexico: Turquoise uniforms for all along with the cherry Zia sun emblem on the uniforms. The state of New Mexico has an awesome flag and you've used it before, there's no issue in making it yours permanently.

For San Diego State: Fish Tacos. Nah, I'm just kidding: actually it's a scholarship kicker along with a National Championship of some sort to break the San Diego Sports curse. Aztec basketball anyone?

For San Jose State: Bring back the Bill Walsh Legacy game. Also, create a trophy for the El Camino Rivalry and Valley Rivalry. The Spartans would have loved to have some hardware this season.

For UNLV: Battle Born uniforms. Also, an on campus football/entertainment stadium (remember, just because it's on the list...doesn't mean you'll get it).

For Utah State: A bionic Chuckie Keeton: all the fun, none of the injuries. NCAA gets confused because there's nothing in the rulebook about bionic people, so his eligibility is endless until they reformat it.

For Wyoming: Consistent success. Not saying that Craig Bohl will bring it, but totally saying that Wyoming should be feared every year with him at the helm.

From all of us here at Mountain West Connection: we wish you the happiest and merriest of Christmases. Here's to more great stories and successes in 2014.

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