David Fales and the Youths of Sparta

Ron Chenoy-USA TODAY Sports

Sing a song, O Muse of College Football, of David Fales and the Spartan Freshmen who conquered the team from a Fort by the name of Collins, where fierce people of the Ram existed.

In the last days of the BCS, two mid-majors fought for relevance in the Mountain West. The people known from the region of Colorado, whose spirit was the Ram, had suffered an encouraging loss to Poseidon's Tide of Crimson. The Ram-people had re-gathered and successfully conquered the miners to the South. The Ram-people had a great leader of Jim McElwain and his general Garrett Grayson.

War loomed in the horizon as David Fales, the leader of some Spartans from San Jose had infiltrated the Mountain West. Fales, known as a master quarterback, said to his inexperienced men:

Men of Sparta, hear my voice.

The only way we shall reach the bowls of lore

is by defeating the Ram-people of the East.

Therin lies the way to the bowls of gold.

Realizing the inexperience of his men, Fales interceded to Apollo Caragher who gifted him with magic footballs that could hit his receivers two Triremes away. On the defensive front, lead scout Bene Benwikere ordered his men to dig down and stop the rushing fury of the Ram-people's infantry, led by Kapri Bibbs.

With the tactics set, the battle was chosen to take place during the noon hour of the twelfth day of the harvest month. The battle was fierce and many points were scored, however no breakthrough could be reached. Finally Garrett Grayson, heaved his football into the sun, in desperation that one of his men would catch it. The scout Benwikere spotted and said:

I have seen my chance to cement my legacy

as a Spartan from San Jose where names are few

I shall challenge this throw from the Gray general

And see the ball as my own.

And thus, Benwikere intercepted the throw and celebrated his skirmish victory. The uniformed demigods were displeased with this notion of celebration, and with their magic from jaundiced flags, forced the Fales and the Spartan Youth to start their offensive skirmish with 14 yards back from the cliffs. Taking one of the balls Apollo Caragher gifted him, Fales launched the gift to one of his Freshmen, Tyler Winston. A new favorite target of Fales, Winston cradled the gift and sprinted the rest of the 62 yards for the final score of the battle.

Forthwith the unheralded defense of the Spartans made a final stop against Grayson and the Ram-people. The day had been won and victory belonged to the Spartan Youth of San Jose. Fales himself, bestowed praise upon his freshmen receivers and a new council of trust was formed speedily so they could prepare for their next contest.

-translated from the Mountain West Cycle

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